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Stuff My Girlfriend Says
Yes, she said all of this stuff. Really.
StuffMyGirlfriendSays.com on Facebook
Yes, she said all of this stuff. Really.
“You give them money for playing music in public? By that rationale, anyone who’s leered at my tits in public owes me a dollar.”
* That’s “Street Performers” for you Americans.
“Just check and see if it clinks or stinks!”
My girlfriend is pretty funny, but I bet that I am not the only person in the world who has a razor-witted spouse-equivalent-unit.
So I’m kinda keen to hear other people’s stories, tales and verbatim quotes of the crazy stuff that their girlfriends/boyfriends/husbands/wives come up with. If I get enough, and people are willing to let me, I’ll put them up on another blog.
So if you’ve got something, and you’d like to send it to me, I’d love to hear it. And, if this blog is anything to go by, so would tons of other people.
Please mail your stories to indefensible@gmail.com and let me know if you’d like to stay anonymous or not.
“I can store things in my cleavage too. I just have to make sure I wipe really well.”
“Let’s just hope when the zombie apocalypse comes we don’t have to eat the iSnack 2.0, because that stuff looks like someone did a Taco Bell shit in a jar.”
“I used to love it when people got off international flights and then got straight onto my little 50-seater jets. They’d ask me what their snack choices were, and I’d say ‘Yes, or no?’ with a big sweet smile on my face. Confused the crap out of them.”
“If I wanted to see lesbians wearing cardigans tucked into mom-jeans, I’d go down the block and drink beer at the Builder’s Arms.”
“Ok. I get it. So they are the evangelical Christian republicans of birds - equal parts stupid, insane and dangerous.”
“That’s because you’re a pervert. It’s not really a spectator sport if you’re just playing spot the camel-toe.”
“Rape sure looked like a lot more fun in the 60s.”
