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Stuff My Girlfriend Says
Yes, she said all of this stuff. Really.
StuffMyGirlfriendSays.com on Facebook
Yes, she said all of this stuff. Really.
“At least it covers your gums when you smile!”
“It felt like being licked by a robot cat.”
“You mean after all this time, bitch is still dickmatized?”
“I’d much rather date a quadriplegic. At least then you could have some awesome Stephen Hawking Speak’N’Spell sex.”
“Back then I was a typical asshole southern Californian. I mean, I still am.”
“I have the perfect sternum-to-tit-meat ratio!”
“Fuck bras. Bras cramp my style.”
“A steak sandwich is just a burger you have to chew harder.”
“At this stage they’re not so much pants as a denim sack held together by farts.”
“Why? Do you have to be sober to get an abortion?”
