May 2010
3 posts
On keeping the noise down.
Me: Hey, do you think the neighbours heard us last night?
Her: We were pretty loud, huh?
Me: Maybe we ought to tone it down a little.
Her: Fuck the neighbours. If I have to listen to them play Jeff Buckley, they can listen to me getting nailed.
Analogies
“Getting a brazilian wax is like putting a spoiler on your car. You can go faster and everyone who sees it knows you care about your ride.”
She really wanted a ride home after work.
“If you picked me up after work I’d be so happy I’d cry. On your penis. With my mouth.”